What an aprehension I have had obviously.
This was one of the worst nights out ever.
Although I was surrounded by four friends (3 of them male) nothing helped me coping with this relapse...
The first thing that was told me was that the owner of my favourite disco and cafe had been mocking about me on Thursday when I didn't appear at the karaoke contest although everyone knows that I love singing and although I am acutally belonging to the establishment :))
I immediately had the horrible imagination how the owner told the anchorman of karaoke that I don't dare to show up because George fucking dumped me. I had good reasons to think so because the owner has never been nice to me. This is because I know everything about his cheating on my friend...
But... it could get worse.
Just when the dancefloor thinned out I could see George. All the time he was dancing alone but when he spotted me he started to hit on the girl that was obviously there with him and his friends. She was so small but at the same time so incredibly fat that I called her Pony.
I know, I know, he is the wanker but that doesn't mean that I wish her the best and I surely do not think that she deserves the guy I still love. :'(
Call me superficial, but I knew I could outrival her 20 times concerning looks but below the line I am the loser. He made sure I saw his hands grabbing her fat arse and it was really hard to keep my head up and to laugh all the time even if I felt like crying. This was also because they were left undisturbed by his best friend Michael, who always interrupted our dancing or kissing 3 months ago. It felt so damn unfair.
When we left 2 hours later because I couldn't stand the sight anymore he also left and queued up at the check-out. Then he grabbed Pony and pulled her close to me and said Hi.
This was very ostentatively, I can tell. All the time he pretended not to know me but with Fat Arse at his side he greeted. The bloody cheek of him!
I managed to keep cool until Sunday evening but then I couldn't help but bawl.
This is so damn unfair.
I was the stopgap to fuck his exgirlfriend out of his brains and I was asked to give him some more time. And now she gets everything I was meant to have. And even his best friend seems okay with that because probably she never turned him down like I did...
Of course I should better think that I should be happy to be disposed of him. That unfair bloody liar. Who knows what our relationship would be like after 5 months now?
Today I noticed that he changed his profile in his internet community: this is for real, he is not being single anymore.
I wish I would never wake up again.
Things are getting worse and worse. But I will tell you tomorrow.